16 hours before my flight to Tasmania, I thought it will be essential for me to jolt down my feelings at this crucial junction. Anxiety is killing me, but it's definitely lesser than what I've expected. Going alone to a foreign place without any friends is just different. At least the times when I was away in the army and navy, I still had a bunch of buddies that I could rely on, but this time round, it's just me. Definitely doesn't help when you are the minority in this new city you're gonna be spending the next two years of your life in. But oh well, I suppose I'll meet some new friends there and maybe be spending some wonderful time with the phenomenal nature sights in the Southern Island of the great Australia. Studies is gonna be the priority, but I am just gonna go there and enjoy life to the fullest. The girlfriend, the family, and the friends are going to be deadly missed, but I suppose this is another development of this somewhat-not-playing-to-expectation life of mine. Interesting how things are going to turn out and I just hope for everything to be smooth sailing.

You know, life is never what i imagined it to be. At least the life im leading now.

In secondary three, i had a passion in the hotel line and i saw myself as a hotelier when i grew up. One that will be wearing suits in a luxurious hotel. One that will be leaving smiles on the satisfied faces of the guest. One that will be enjoying his job so much while interacting with people from diverse background. So this was gonna be my life, i thought.

After i graduated with my diploma. I found myself not wanting to stay in the hospitality industry due to the long service hours and the pay that was 'underpaid'. So i imagined myself to go through my 2 years of NS, get into a private uni with a business degree and maybe you know, work in an office job and slowly slog my way up the corporate ladder. So this was gonna be my life, i thought.

While i was waiting to go into NS, i interacted with countless types of people while i worked customer service at motorola service centre. It was then when i was approached by a few personnel working in the sales industry and they say I'll make some good money if I was part of them. So there I went, yeah maybe I am really cut out for sales, as many others echo the same. So I thought of becoming an insurance/car/property agent that can perhaps earn more than average and complete my part time studies at the same time. So this was gonna be my life, I thought.

I used to question people whom signed on as a regular in the forces. Never really thought how the regimentation and mundane job scope of the forces can appeal to anyone. I was wrong. There were numerous recruitment talks during my BMT, the navy's particularly called out to me. The job appealed to me as I can see the world, earn a slightly above average pay grade, not depend on my family for university fees and at the same time, be forced to keep fit. So after talking to a close friend in BMT, we decided to take a leap of faith into the deep blue waters of the navy. AND THIS, IS MY CURRENT LIFE, nowhere near what I've imagined myself to be like 3 years ago. Also, I used to think I will never ever leave Singapore to pursue my studies overseas, as I find the bonds, friendships and kinship here too difficult to let go. But now, I will be flying over to Tasmania to pursue my studies for 2 years and there's gonna be another important phase of my life that I have never in my dreams, put myself studying overseas. Oh well, I would say this life ain't that bad afterall and I can only hope it keeps moving up :)

Happy 3rd, my love. Today started off with a surprise by the girl, coming over in the morning to deliver breakfast and the present. As a person whom doesn't show my emotions thoroughly, the girl thought that she didn't succeed. On the contrary, she did manage to do so and I was truly and deeply touched by her actions; as she is someone that is lazy and really don't plan surprises normally. hahaha. the day was followed by a date at zoo and it was nothing but fun-filled. Absolutely nothing can beat quality time spent with her.

It's been three months of ups and downs, and let the future seas be calm or be rough, for in both conditions i'll sail our love boat till the destination called happiness and bliss.

'The first time I saw her, it always interesting for me to look back on it. It was no sense of how important this person will become. People talk about love at first sight, but I find this, my version to be so much more interesting; or I should say my story, our story to be so much more interesting. Because when we first met each other, we have no idea how important the other will become. And its over time, after getting to know each, and slowly, starting to able to feel, all these different feelings I never had for another person, and it became apparent over time that this person is incredibly special, unlike anyone else that I've met before some one that fit me. I mean now it's her smile, her laughter and I love that she laughs all the time and she has a very big wide grin. I hope that her tears, her sadness, her laughter, her joy, I'll be the first to know and experience it with her'

Nex. Teadot. Small table. Both of us. The mixture of noise and busy scene of people just passing by. It's like how we're in our own world, undisturbed and nonchalant about the existence of the fully filled tables around us. I guess they're right. When you're in love, you are just encompassed by her. Your eyes have no sights set on anyone else but her. Her slightest movements seems like the biggest thing and you wanna give her all the attention she might be craving for. The past week might not be the happiest we've spent together; sadness, doubts, anger, negatives. But things are looking up and I'm sure she's cheering up too. As all it matters is her happiness, for it is mine too.